Roses are Red, Valentine’s a boo

Roses are Red, Valentine’s a boo

For many, Valentine’s Day is a day filled with images of love, friendship and perhaps most importantly, companionship with the one you cherish and care about. Unfortunately, that image is not exactly shared by the masses, and some hearts feel the exact opposite of love; loneliness and emptiness.

Alot of us inevitably feel sad that we don’t have a partner for Valentine’s Day. Worse still, some of us end up over-thinking things and start to ponder our self-proclaimed short-comings – a can of worms which really should not be opened.

Despite all this, many of us still feel that hollow sting when we see couples together and we don’t have anyone to call our own. How then do we get by? How do not feel like losers?

After being rejected numerous times and having my relationships explode in spectacularly ridiculous manners, I learnt that having fun is more important than having a relationship. That there were many more things important than merely settling for the simple dream of a happy family. Things like helping those in true dire straits and had no one else to turn to, or giving hope to someone who didn’t have any – heck, even putting a smile on a fellow man’s face.

Ultimately, I guess I learnt that love is not about holding hands, or feeling the human touch. While these constituted to the ideas of love, there were many other definitions of love. Love of mankind, of community, of nature. Love of oneself, to accept one’s short-comings regardless big or small. Love that is not the warm, fuzzy or sex based, but one that is based on humanity, compassion and self-belief.

Happy Valentine’s Day friend. 🙂

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13 comments

  1. syaqattack

    it;s nice=)

  2. Tim

    Im back to troll! (Coz I have too much free time). And here goes my reply that is two years a tad too late.

    ………………….

    Ah love! and woes of men with broken hearts. And then there is unrequited love. It never quits. An infinite curse of the lonely heart. Well, in retrospect, without broken hearts, great poets wouldn’t be born.

    And then there is this Valentine’s day, which is a colossal joke. I mean really, having born on this day people automatically assumed I would be the happiest lad around. It was quite the opposite. If I am to morph into a feline species to illustrate my view on this day,it would be the famous grumpy cat.

    Well, you’re not alone when it comes to rejections. And at least you had relationships to boast. The worst of all rejections are rejections of silence and painful avoidance. And then you will feel like your world crumbles and you feel like laying down and die and you start to question your purpose in life and you put those depressing love songs on repeat and you lost your appetite for anything and so forth and the cycle repeats for a period that seems like an eternity. You fell and it was a bad fall indeed.

    Some had the misfortune of never recovering from the fall. And the fall I had was being cooped up too much in my own little world with readings and blogs and getting myself hopelessly infatuated with writers.

    But I digress.

    Love is like a jigsaw puzzle. I suppose Valentine’s Day is for people who found their pieces and placed them together. I guess I’ll never find mine.

    Before I end this lengthy and substantively melancholic post, I shall take the liberty to share one of my favorite quotes;

    “A mighty pain to love it is,
    And ’tis a pain that pain to miss;
    But of all pains, the greatest pain
    It is to love, but love in vain.”

    ― Abraham Cowley

    P.s I’ll be back to troll. haha

  3. lola

    i like how you define love! 🙂
    that’s almost my sentiment, lol.

    p/s: aahah a 3 years’ back post and i’m reading back all. oopsss!

    • Thanks! =)

      However I daresay that my view on love has changed a bit. Changed in the sense that … there is an absolute zero. That some people aren’t worth caring about. At all. Despite their presence in a community.

      • Lola

        True that “some” aren’t worth your time, your energy & your effort to care about.

        Talking about reciprocate huh… Not everyone does reciprocate y’know.

        But… I believe that there’s STILL some people in your life who cares and by that means observe their actions instead of words. Or perhaps…….. someone out there whom secretly pray for you.

        Heh, you might never know… Mr Bard 🙂

        ……And I just noticed that you are somewhat romantic in this post hahahaah!

      • Hey I can be romantic if I want to. It’s just that in recent times I’ve yet to meet any lady who has made my heart stop and make me do a double take. :p

  4. Lola

    Recent times?!
    Um hmm.. But surely that lady must fit into your requirements (eg. Hot, toned body) eh?

    Haaa guys will be guys (:

    • Weellll i admit i have A List *dun dunnn dunnnn*. Hot and sporty really.

      Hot…is well sorta objective. Alot of girls I found as niners were often scores as sixers or sevens. So…that bit is subjective lah.

      But the sporty bit is cause I do alot of sports myself and it would be easier to relate (to a degree) to a person who does sports as well.

      There’s a personality list as well but that’s secret. Hehhehe.

      I’m sure most ladies also have some criteria for their ideal guy in the looks deparment.

      • Lola

        Ahhaah whaaat shouldn’t the personality list be revealed? *facepalm*

        Ohhhhh, I can guess those secret personalities, lol.

        You not attractive meh? Surely you are, Mr Bard.

      • You’re welcome to try and guess heh :p

        I’m …okay. I have my flaws both in the looks and personality department.

  5. Lola

    Oh my……. I literally forget to check this out but let’s not beat around the bush ah.

    You must have preferred ladies with decent types but……. Hahah!

    So……if you were to go for a date OR getting married anytime soon, which should you prefer:
    1) hot & sporty?
    2) secret personality of yours?

    Without any doubt, both options would be a bonus huh… but choose ONE!

    • Hello Lola,

      I’ve actually spent the better part of two days trying to figure out how to answer this. Plus you took out my usual choice of Option C (aka Both)…..and well….I still don’t know how to answer this.

      On one hand the sporty bit of option 1 already suggests several personality inclinations that would be appealing to me, especially if I’m at the dating stage. I daresay everyone, at one degree or another is superficial in nature and looks are important. Same goes with me.

      On the other, marriage is a long time and personality traits play a key role in relationship dynamics. Of give and take, of compromise and so on and so forth.

      As such, if I was dating I would probably go with 1; if marriage I would probably go with 2.

      However…I think what is perhaps more important than finding the ideal girl is the concept of being the right person for the dream girl. We always think ‘oh find dream girl, things will be perfect’. Experience has taught me otherwise. Learning how to be there, how to manage time (always important), understanding and coming to terms with one’s self …..are just a few things that are more important than consistently seeking (keywords here) the ideal gf/fiancee/wifey.

      Wow I wrote alot more than I intended.

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